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Peter Griffin vs Shrek
Peter vs Shrek is a What If Episode of Death Battle. This TN was by Shakaboy. Description Family Guy vs Shrek, it's the battle between two overweight fathers of three that have an animal best friend (Brian and Donkey) that are known for farting and being stupid. But who'll win? Interlude Wiz: Fathers are a common character type in fiction, with notable examples being Homer Simpson, Fred Flinstone, George Jetson, etc. Boomstick: But another common type of father is the idiot father. And these two are not only idiots, but they're disgusting too! Wiz: Like Peter Griffin, the father of the Griffin family. Boomstick: And Shrek, the internet's Ogrelord. Wiz: He's Boomstick and I'm Wiz, and it's time to make these two fight in a Death Battle. But first, we gotta analyze. Peter Wiz: Peter Griffin is the father of the Griffins, which consist of Lois, Meg, Chris, Brian and Stewie. Boomstick: It's basically a ripoff of the Simpsons, or any family related sitcom. Wiz: Peter, despite being very fat, is actually the strongest character in his verse, with things like his Superhuman strength, being able to throw cars with ease. He's also a very skilled fighter since he regularly battles Ernie the Chicken. Boomstick: Ol' Pete here also has Regeneration, as he's able to regenerate limbs just by concentrating really hard on it. Detached limbs can also create more Peters. Wait, this sounds familiar. Wiz: Peter also has a ton of vehicles like the PeterMobile, which is just a car. The PeterDactyl is a pterodactyl that lets Peter fly around. The PeterCopter is a helicopter, the PeterBlimp is a blimp and that's basically it. Boomstick: He also has a ton of guns like a hunting rifle, a shotgun, a pistol, a machine gun and a RPG. Wiz: He also has a sword and knight armor, a baseball bat, a whip, grenades, fire crackers, an axe, and even a tank, and also a mech suit, which can fire missiles and lasers. Boomstick: But wait, there's more! Peter can also perform the Road House, which is a roundhouse kick able to destroy walls. He can also perform Hadokens and Shoryukens, and can turn people into Robin Williams with his magical finger. Wait, what the fuck? Wiz: Peter can also shapeshift and can also fart fire from his butt. He can also perform Fourth Wall Breaking and can surprisingly teleport. Boomstick: Peter is extremely durable, able to survive stuff like logs, bullets, swords, and even survived the Earth exploding. He also is strong enough to lift buses and even destroyed multiple buildings. Wiz: However, Peter is extremely stupid, but despite that, he's easily one of the strongest cartoon characters to ever live. Lois: It seems today, that all you see, is violence in movies and sex on TV. Peter: But where were those good ol' fashioned values, on which we used to rely! Shrek Boomstick: Somebody once told me, the world is gonna roll me. I ain't the sharpest tool in the shed.... Wiz: I can't believe we're actually doing this. Ugh, anyway, when Shrek was a 7 year old Ogre, due to Ogre rules, Shrek was thrown out of his house and told that no one would ever love him. Boomstick: She was looking kinda dumb with her finger and her thumb in the shape of an L on her forehead. Well, the years start coming... Wiz: Can you stop singing All Star please? Boomstick: Alright, fine. Party pooper. Wiz: Anyway, Shrek being an Ogre has superhuman strength, easily being able to lift boxes and boulders and stuff like that. DreamWorks says that Ogres can lift 20 times their own weight, meaning that Shrek can lift up to 12,000 pounds or 6 tons. Boomstick: I guess you can say Shrek's an All Star! Wiz: Ugh. Boomstick: Anyway, Shrek also has some abilities, like his ability to be good with any weapon, whether it be a sword, char or a shield. He's like Jackie Chan but Shrexier. Wiz: Shrek also has potions he can use like the Strength Potion, which makes him stronger, the Speed Potion, which makes him quicker and the Shield Potion, which protects him from damage. Boomstick: And last but not least, Shrek has disgusting abilities like farts and belches. His belches and farts just smell like crap at first, but when he gets a torch, they turn into flamethrower weapons. Wiz: Shrek has defeated Farquaad's man, survived a beatdown from a dragon and outran said dragon, avoided lightning and even survived a kick to the nuts from Donkey. Shrek, however, is weak to sharp objects and has low self-esteem. Boomstick: Insert Shrek is Love, Shrek is Life joke here. Shrek: Ogres are like onions! End of story! Bye-Bye! (whispers) See ya later! Pre-Fight Wiz: Alright, the combatants are set. Let's end this debate once and for all. Boomstick: It's time for a Death Battle! Fight Peter and his buddies Quagmire, Joe and Cleveland were exploring a swamp looking for the treasure. However, they were in Shrek's swamp, which of course, made Shrek angry. Shrek bursts out of the door and lets out a roar. Shrek: What are you doing in my swamp! Peter: Hey, who said this is your swamp? Cleveland: Peter, you probably should listen to-AHH! Shrek punches Cleveland in the face, which causes him to go unconscious. Quagmire and Joe quickly run away. Peter tries to follow, but Shrek grabs him by the shirt and kicks him. Shrek: You're gonna learn the hard way why you don't go into my swamp! Peter: Nyehehehe, we'll see about that, you Hulk wannabe. Fight! Peter and Shrek rush up to each other and begin trading punches. Peter gains the upper hand and starts slugging Shrek multiple times before delivering a Roadhouse kick. Shrek gets knocked back, but he manages to get up and throws a boulder at Peter. Peter: Aw crap. Peter gets hit by the boulder and knocked down. Shrek grabs Peter and performs a piledriver, slamming Peter into the ground. Peter gets up and ducks under a punch from Shrek, then throws a punch in his chest, which knocks Shrek back. Peter then shoots a Hadoken at Shrek, who jumps over it and throws a jumping kick. However, Peter performs a Shoryuken, which send Shrek flying away. Peter: Nyehehhehehe. Shrek gets up and grabs a nearby sword and swings it at Peter, who grabs his own sword and blocks the attack. The two begin a sword fight, until Shrek overpowers Peter and slashes him twice, which hurts him. Peter regenerates, then throws a punch at Shrek, who uses his sword to block it. Shrek then performs the Ogre Roar. Shrek: ROOOOOOOOOOOOOOAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRRR!!!!! Peter was sent back, as Shrek walks up to Peter and chucks him into a tree. Peter gets up and pulls out his whip and starts swinging it at Shrek. Shrek moves backwards to avoid the whip. Peter then swings again, but Shrek grabs his whip and starts swinging Peter around in circles, causing Peter to hit various trees and bushes. Shrek then continues to swing Peter until Peter teleports off the whip and next to Shrek. Peter then performs a jump kick on Shrek, which stuns him and causes him to drop the whip. Peter grabs the whip and swings it at Shrek, this time it hits him and causes bruises all over Shrek's body. Peter swings it multiple times, until Shrek grabs it again. The two play Tug-of-War over it until Peter loses. Shrek then grabs the whip and breaks it, then grabs Peter and punches him various times before punting him back. Peter: No, my whip! Now I can't cosplay as Indiana Jones anymore! Peter then pulls out his mech suit and gets in. Now in his mech suit, Peter starts firing missiles at Shrek, who avoids them with a roll. Shrek sees the mech's claws and starts punching Peter to push the mech away. The mech comes back and starts drilling Shrek, which causes Shrek to start bleeding. Shrek uses two kicks to send the mech flying. Shrek then sees Peter fire a laser beam at him, which hits Shrek and sends him flying. Peter's mech activates its jetpacks and flies after him. When he finds Shrek, he sees Shrek with a tree. Shrek uses the tree like a sword and hits Peter's mech multiple times, causing it to break. Shrek then smashes the mech one more time, causing it to break and knock Peter out of it. Shrek then eats Chili Peppers and prepares to perform his flamethrower fart. Peter: Alright pal, I think we know what the best way of settling it is. Shrek: What is it? Peter: Using our asses. Prepare to fire! Peter and Shrek aim their butts at each other, and perform their fart attack. Peter and Shrek's farts seem even at first, until Peter's eventually overpowers Shrek's, causing the fiery fart-ness to hit Shrek and incinerate him. Peter walks over to where Shrek is, and sees there's nothing left but ashes. Peter: Wow, that's a little dark. Better hope the kids don't see this. KO! Results Boomstick: Shrek is love, Shrek is life? I don't think so. Wiz: While Shrek was smarter and bigger than Peter, Peter's unorthodox toon force and his durability gave him the victory. Boomstick: Shrek was slightly stronger than Peter since he can lift boulders and uproot trees, but Shrek didn't have the power to kill Peter. Peter has survived explosions, getting hit by two logs in the face, getting crushed by trucks and getting his head cut off by a frisbee. Wiz: Peter also had more experience since he battles a giant chicken daily while Shrek usually uses his friends to help him out in fights. Peter also had toon force hax to help him out, like the ability to regenerate, create clones and even manipulate the gravity of the area, which would definitely throw Shrek off. Boomstick: Looks like our Ogrelord was Shrekted. Wiz: The winner is Peter Griffin. Category:What-If? Death Battles Category:"Male vs Male" Themed Death Battles Category:Human vs Creature themed DEATH BATTLEs Category:'Hero vs. Hero' Themed Death Battle Category:'Hero vs. Anti-Hero' themed Death Battles Category:Anti Hero themed Death Battles Category:Movie vs TV shows theme Death battle Category:Fistfight Category:'Strength' themed Death Battle Category:Hipper's Battles Category:Adopted What-If? Death Battles Category:Completed What-If? Death Battles Category:Main Protagonist Duel Category:What-If? Death Battles completed in 2017